I no longer have a regular stomach. Tonight I forgot that as I ate a pork chop. I chewed a few times and swallowed a chunk way too big. That was frightening. So far so good. It isn’t stuck, but I was much more careful chewing the rest of the pork chop.
I’m 400.0 pounds on the dot today. What a relief it was when my talking scale proclaimed “four hundred and zero pounds”. Finally things are moving again.
I’m staying off the scale for now for my own peace of mind. I’ve been taking my lasix, but feel heavy and my feet are puffy, which probably means I haven’t lost any weight. Maybe I should only weigh in once a week or even once a month. Any thoughts out there which I should choose? Weighing everyday has brought me down.
Other than not taking my lasix, I cannot figure out how I went up six pounds in one day. This is very frustrating. I’ve been really puffy lately.
Yesterday at Walmart I saw an obese woman sitting in a motorized wheelchair. I was surprised to find myself judging her. “If she would get up and walk, she wouldn’t have to use that chair,” I thought.
I have no reason to judge. She was much smaller than me. I’m not opposed to using the courtesy motorized carts available at the store if my back is especially hurting or I’m just feeling lazy and don’t want to walk. The upsetting thing about my judgement was I have no idea who that person was or what she was about. I’m sure people judge me for my size and weight. They don’t know me, but they judge me. I tend to ignore the looks I get and carry on. Being judged silently is bothersome, but I need to work on not judging others in the same condition as me. Easier said than done.
Today, I swung by Taco Bell to grab something quick to eat. I’m still in the soft food stage of a four-stage process of retraining myself how to eat. The 5-layer, beefy burrito looked wonderful so I ordered it. Now back at home the burrito sits off to the side. I have no desire to eat it. I drank the rest of a chocolate protein drink and now my stomach is pleasantly full–no room for the burrito.
I’ll pop it in the refrigerator for later; later may never come.
Today I went to the doctors–my regular family doctor not the surgeon and weighed in at 402.3 pounds.
I was thrilled, so was the medical assistant who weighed me once she saw how much I had dropped.
My doctor was pleased too.